Sometimes life can feel like a hamster wheel. Definitely, the laundry feels like that. Miss one day, or two and the mountain of clothes to be washed or dried or folded comes crashing down. Then you have to jump back on and maintain that perfect rhythm again. Or else.

But life is more than laundry (no, really) and I think the hamster wheel can apply to anything. What I find interesting about this contraption is sometimes we forget that we actually have some control over the pace at which it spins. And we have some control over what – or who – we bring along for the ride.

My family likes to go down to the lake when we can – about once a month over the winter and more in the spring and summer. It’s our happy place. It’s relief and freedom for each of us. What I love most about our trips to the lake is the time and capacity to reflect; I am truly in awe of how easily the excess crap melts away, while the things that really matter rise to the surface.

IMG_5939

Every family works differently because the individuals that make it up have their own needs and interests. And each family as a unit has its own culture: values and goals that represent those individual needs plus something all-encompassing. It’s really important to be tuned-in to that culture and those values when you want to live an authentic life.

I’m sharing this because I hear moms talk about their worries about doing what’s best for their kids and their families. They look for answers in books or in other moms. Or they ignore those thoughts that creep up in those slivers of moments in between activity.

By all means, I think we can turn to whatever source of support we think we need – but I just want to remind you that the greatest expert on what your family needs is YOU.

Only you know what you want for your family. And most importantly, only you know WHY you want what you want for your family.

If your WHY is aligned with your values, then do what it takes to create that life for your people. If your WHY has anything to do with an outside influence, please go to a place where you feel relieved and free. An actual physical place outside of you, or some place quiet and deep inside of you. Ask yourself WHY in that place.

Why am I making these choices? Why do I want these things? Why is this a priority?

Everything else will fall into place. It’s a bumpy road for me, sometimes. We live in a culture of ‘do more’ but inside me, there is conflict in that. So regular check-ins help me figure out how to address that conflict.

I’m hoping this is helpful to you in your everyday decisions and in the big picture.

Let me know how you are handling the hamster wheel – are you dancing like the guy on the treadmill in that viral Facebook video? Or do you keep crashing and wondering what the heck is going on?

Thanks for reading!

taslim jaffer, let me out creative