…there is a ME! Whether your team is your family (your first family that you were born into or your new family that you have created with a spouse), or your office colleagues, or your group of friends, this holds true!
You want your team to be taken care of, happy and comfortable – I totally understand that. You want to be sure that the plays you make (i.e. decisions you make) support and benefit the team. It’s nice when everyone around you has few complaints and you are part of the reason why they are thriving.
BUT here’s something that also holds true: A team is only as strong as its “weakest” player. So, if you’re giving and giving and giving to your team and not replenishing your goods, you are bound to be the player who drops the ball at a pivotal point in the game. Depleting yourself or depriving yourself so that your team can be stronger is simply illogical. It’s a very emotional-based thought process; it comes from that beautiful heart of yours.
My heart is the same way. It wants to hug and provide for everyone I love but it needs reminding to show me that same kind of love. Think about how much care you give yourself – physically, emotionally, spiritually. Would you hope that someone you love is treating themselves the same way? Or would you, out of concern and compassion, ask them to take better care of themselves? If it’s the latter, well, I think you know where this is going.
On my weekend away, I was talking to a couple of the girls who are in the health care profession. One of them made an observation about a patient who spent a lot of time and energy on the health of her children but who herself was neglecting her own health. “Isn’t that often the case?” I asked. “I almost think there’s an inverse relationship between a mother’s health and the health of her kids.” Of course, I was being a little facetious. This is NOT how I think it should be and I KNOW that is it not truly how the world works. A mother, or father, is a great role model for their children’s health; active, health-conscious parents are likely to produce similar children. But I do think that it’s easy for a mother to spend a significant amount of her resources on her children and deplete the energy to keep up in these areas for herself.
So, if you are worried that taking time out to take care of yourself (by going to the gym, taking a dance class, doing the Tuesday Tasks, taking a bubble bath) is selfish or will take away from your team, I hope this post has given you something to think about. Any comments? I’d love to hear them!